Black Lives Matter in My White Life

I had a black grandfather not by blood, but in all the ways that mattered. From my infancy to his death bed his gentle soul left a heartprint on mine. I learned about unity seeing my black grandfather, born 1900, and my white grandfather, born 1910, - both having seen their share of the worst of this world - tend our vegetable garden then sit together on the porch and watch the garden grow. But this sweet treasure of my childhood doesn't mean I understand the Black Experience. I taught several years in a black school. Some of my students put me through the wringer my first year, but not all, not most. But some. And it became a special connection we laughed at together a year or two down the line. For some, but not all, not most. I could not encapsulate their world, not here, not ever, But their humor and humanity strength and pride sass and sweetness left their mark on my world. I likely learned more than I taught, but it doesn't mean I understand the Black Experience. Some of my closest friends have been black women. A lot of laughter and keeping things real came in equal measure in the hours spent talking in the classroom after hours walking laps, pushing strollers in the mall. We shared the highest celebrations life brought to our doorsteps, held each other close during the devastation of loss. Our times together shaped who I became as an adult. Though we journeyed so far together I still do not understand the Black Experience. Because I am white. White, white. Blond haired, blue eyed white. I am slow to speak. I watch and listen. I'm taking it in. I don't know my part. But I'm listening. I'm learning. I will bath my actions in kindness and my words in love. I will teach my children to do the same. Like my grandfathers, I'll tend this garden out of control before us, pull out the weeds fertilize the land and plant good fruit. And hopefully one day soon we too can sit together and watch this garden grow.

2 Comments on “Black Lives Matter in My White Life”

Jane
October 19, 2021

Thank you for using your God given gifts to keep my eyes open and hopefully my heart.

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- Sue Santiago
  October 19, 2021
  
  Thanks Jane 🥰 like how you feed our soul and our stomachs, we all can put love into the world with our set of talents.
  
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